Now What? A Strategy. Part 3

I needed a strategy to realize my dreams. By now, I'm in my 30s and have been pursuing this growing passion for cooking for several years. I'm looking for a real opportunity. A few days away from everything clearing my head and focusing on a strategy was paramount. So I headed to Nicaragua of all places. Why Nicaragua you ask?  Not sure, just another decision that makes Jen question me at times. But she always has been very understanding and knew that I was struggling, so she sent me off for a few days to figure it out. 

Besides the people, the great thing about Nicaragua was the rawness of the place.  You have no choice but to connect with yourself.  Barebones accommodations, power that goes on and off, it was a spiritual journey to find oneself.  It was perfect. No distractions. Just me and a few new friends found along the way, most of whom were looking for the same thing:  What was life all about and how do I fit in? 

It's not like I had some epiphany on that trip, but it impacted me and moved me in the right direction. I saw that Nicaragua was at a pivotal time with a new president, talk of democracy, and plenty of opportunity.

Over the next couple of months, I researched what could I do. I thought culinary school might be the answer, so I toured a few and kept my options open. I wanted culinary school to be the answer, something structured that would prepare me and create a future.  I didn’t feel it.  Most of the students were kids and it just wasn’t for me.  Plus it was expensive.  It wasn’t an investment that would pay off in my opinion.  So, disappointed, I continued to explore my options. 

Time continued to pass, and I struggled for the answer.  Then one day, I excitedly said to my wife "I figured it out. Let’s move to Hawaii and I will find a job at a hotel working in whatever capacity they need." It was the birthplace of Hawaii Regional Cuisine from chefs Peter Merriman, Roy Yamaguchi, and Alan Wong. I always wanted to live in Hawaii. It was on my bucket list, so why not? Plus, the fresh fruit, vegetables, and seafood would make it a great place to start my culinary journey. I could tell she knew I was serious, but she also knew how to temper me with logic. The amazing thing is she never said no. Jen is a great thinker so I knew she would get back to me with something that made sense. 

We do have a 1-year-old and another on the way, so hasty decisions aren’t the answer, I guess. I tell Jen all the time if she wasn’t in my life, I’m not sure what my life would be like. We are opposites, Jen quick to listen and me quick to blab my mouth off. 

After some time discussing, we decided that I would go to Hawaii to the Big Island and talk to the chefs of the resort hotels and see if someone would be interested in hiring me. Off I went to pursue this course of action. I had no experience, only self-taught. I had never worked in a restaurant, but I hoped someone would give me a chance. 

After many nos, I felt rejected, doubting why I was even there. Am I crazy? Why do I do this to myself? Step out on a limb and it begins to splinter. I was nearing the end of my trip, and I had a couple more chefs to see. The executive chef at the Fairmont Orchid was my last hope. After a brief discussion, he sent me down to talk to the executive sous chef. At this point, I was hopeful because it wasn’t a no.  The executive sous chef was an interesting guy. He was eccentric with a great sense of humor and honest enough. I believe we connected a little. He told me if I came back there would be a job for me. It’s all I needed to hear. I floated out of the place thanking him along the way. 

I’m sure he thought he would never see me again. 

I called Jen and told her the news. She thought it seemed promising. During the long flight back home to Minnesota, my mind raced as I tried to put together a plan of how we could really do this. 

I knew I had a few major obstacles in front of me: 

First, we had some projects on the house to complete before we could put our house on the market. 

Second, I would have to tell our family about our new direction. 

Third, we didn’t have much money, a minor detail. 

Selling the house would give us a start, but the money would run out fast in expensive Hawaii.  My philosophy:  get there and deal with the rest later. 

The most difficult aspect of our move proved to be telling family, especially our toddlers' grandparents. I dreaded this. We had a 1- and 3-year-old, so I heard how this wasn’t a good idea. My father specifically told me the things I didn’t want to hear, I guess what any father would tell his son in that moment. I wasn’t young so I didn’t need approval, but my parents did not want me to make a hasty decision, and my father who I looked up to was very opposed. He thought I was crazy for doing this. 

I was so focused that my ignorance blurred out any rational thought. Which I know now can be the only answer: don’t listen to objections when it feels right. Our parents just had different visions and aspirations. I kept telling myself I was doing the right thing. 

It was interesting how clear this decision was for me. I never had any doubts. I knew I would need to take care of my family. I told myself I would be willing to work 24 hours a day if I needed to – a statement that later came very close to reality. The projects that needed to be completed on the house were a distraction to me. Being a contractor helped, so I had the ability to get this done, but it was hard to focus on the present task with this new plan before me.  Ultimately we finished the projects and put the house on the market.  There was a sense of relief on that day, but we now had to wait and hope the house sold quickly.  It was 2007, and we all know what happened to the real estate market shortly after, but fortunately, our house sold, and we were off to Hawaii.